Ah, the age old question of how to start a blog post after an almost six month hiatus. I think the answer is don’t take said hiatus…well, now I know for next time?! 😉

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This blog post has been in the making for half of that break. I took summer to travel, spend quality time with family and friends, and relax after the craziness that was my first year of teaching.

Sitting down to write this post (which, let’s be honest, has been less “sit down and write” and more “I have an idea for a blog post better jot it down in my notes app”) had me thinking a little more about my “goals” for this blog.

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When I first started this platform, my mind ran with the possibilities. I thought I could share fun stories, lesson plans, classroom management strategies, and teacher tips. In theory, all of my stories and posts could help struggling college students who need ELA ideas for lesson plans and new teachers, like myself, who want to make their English classroom engaging and fun.

I looked over all the notes I’ve been taking in my six months off (and trust me, there are lots), and I realized none of those potential posts fit the “ideal blog” space I’d created in my head. It wasn’t positive and uplifting stories. There were no great lesson plans that revolutionized the art of teaching ELA. I had no great classroom management strategies or teacher tips for engagement or relationship building.

Instead, my potential posts felt more like cries for help. Begging for ideas, suggestions, strength, and relief.

How? How, only three months into year number two, am I already feeling so broken?

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I think the main reason for my long break is that I wasn’t ready to admit that my journey as a teacher hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows. In fact, in my darkest moments, it’s been hard to see any sunshine or imagine the possibility of a rainbow.

It’s been so easy to see other teachers post on Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok about the great things happening in their classroom. It’s been so easy to compare myself and my classroom to those pictures and feel disheartened that I’m not having that same experience.

I don’t want this blog to turn into a sob story. A space for one very stressed new teacher to complain and whine.

I do think, however, that it’s important to be honest about my experience. If ever this post comes across the feed of another young, stressed teacher, I want him/her/them to know they aren’t alone – even if it feels like it.

In case ^ they come across this post, here are the two pieces of advice I feel qualified to give at this point in my teaching journey:

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1. When it comes to teaching, always plan in pencil.

Here’s what I mean:

– don’t shell out the few extra dollars for the personalized planner with each class printed at the top of page. While cute and, at the time, practical, you never know if your schedule will get changed the week before classes start (or the first day of professional development before classes start). Taking an extra minute to hand-write your classes on the page looks and feels better than having to cross out the printed class to write the new one over it. Always plan in pencil.

– when an activity you spent hours planning and prepping crashes and burns (or your students just refuse to even begin the project), it’s easier to go back and redo your unit if you can just erase the initial ideas in the planner and start over. Always plan in pencil.

– if, after three months, your classroom management strategies still aren’t working, it’s easier to brainstorm new ideas and adjust the policies and procedures if you can go back to the master plan in your notebook and erase (plus, sometimes all that erasing can be therapeutic). Always plan in pencil.

2. When it comes to you, always plan in Sharpie.

And I mean those *huge* Sharpies that you’d use on a poster. Outline it, underline it, go over it twice, and use lots of colors.

– YOU are more important than pencil marks in a planner.

– YOU are more important than crashed lesson plans or units that change every day.

– YOU are more important than students who challenge you and push you to your limits.

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In the last year, my plans and goals for this blog have shifted and changed, and I’m sure that they will every year as I learn and grow as a teacher. For this blog, I will plan in pencil.

In the last year, my plans and goals for myself as a teacher have shifted and changed. But my value and importance as a person have stayed rock solid. I am important. I am worthy. And I am meant to be a teacher. For myself, I will write in Sharpie.